Jan 01 2008

WriteImage: creative writing, T.A.R.D.-style

Published by at 8:57 pm under Uncategorized

Fiction used to bore me. Of course, that was before I decided I wanted to write it. Now this writer is reading anything and everything to get inspiration for that special piece of work that will take the literary world by storm.

My own fiction writing tends to stray into macho, uber-violent, Hemingwayesque territory. Probably its a sort of intellectual rebellion against my totally risk-adverse lifestyle. But I do appreciate fiction that can take on topics in a tough-guy voice – particularly when it’s with a humorous bent. “Special” Forces, by Mark Fournier, is a masterpiece of this kind of fiction. Read on, and enjoy.

An excerpt follows:

Colonel Thomson:

In keeping with Airborne policy to maintain a force of the best and the brightest, we have discovered a number of personel who do not meet that qualification. To put it bluntly, they are dumbfucks. To put it even more bluntly, they have been trained in elite killing techniques, which means that they are now probably sociopathic dumbfucks.

We are at a loss as to what to do with them, so we are giving them to you. You are to take these men and assemble them into the Tactically Abridged Response Detail, or T.A.R.D. Make us proud, Colonel.

General Jim Ehrman
Airborne Command


Colonel Thomson’s Command Log
Entry 21/07/07

What have I gotten myself into. I have 22 men who take best of three tries to get their pants on, and I’ve given up on getting them to put the fly in front…

Special stuff, indeed.

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One response so far

One Response to “WriteImage: creative writing, T.A.R.D.-style”

  1. Blancaon 04 Jan 2008 at 7:11 pm

    The T.A.R.D.s! Har! Military comedy. It takes a special understanding to bridge those extremes. Loved the excerpt. I’m going to check out that author. The description of how dumb the men are — by describing how they put their pants on — is an effective literary technique. It gives one’s imagination something to chew on. Very satisfying.

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