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Meanwhile, in a dingy meeting room at Parliament Hill in Ottawa:

JACK LAYTON
We don’t have to be adversaries, Stephen. We both want to avoid an election.

STEPHEN HARPER (thinking)
Why is Mr. Layton being so nice to me?

JACK LAYTON
And if you scratch my back, I’ll scratch yours.

STEPHEN HARPER (thinking)
Wait a minute. Is he coming onto me?

JACK LAYTON
I mean, if I should slip some political advice into your pocket, what’s the harm?

STEPHEN HARPER (thinking)
My God! He is coming onto me!

JACK LAYTON
After all, negotiations make strange bedfellows.

STEPHEN HARPER
Sorry, Mr. Layton, but I don’t go in for these backdoor shenanigans. Sure, I’m flattered, maybe even a little curious, but the answer is no!

(Adapted from Last Exit to Springfield)

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