Nov 17 2009
An abrupt debate about Afghanistan in Vancouver this week, short version:
Malalai Joya, Afghan parliamentarian and book-touring toast of the left wing
Brian Platt, straight-talking, butt-kicking Canuck
And once again, I call on the imperialist Yanks to get out of my country so Afghans can sort out their own problems.
The last time Afghans tried to sort out their own problems, the Taliban took over, invited Al Queda over for cocktails and pulled off the fantastical feat of making the poorest and most downtrodden people in the world even more miserable by a factor of 100.
Bite your tongue, impertinent muckity-muck.
Tell me again how pulling out the troops and letting the Taliban take over is good for women?
We demand the right to be oppressed by thugs of our own choosing!
Hear, hear! Hail to the thugs! Death to America! Death to the United Nations!
Don’t you get it? If the UN pulls out, we’re talking Hobbes-style, nasty, brutish and short. And your fellow women are going to get the worst end of it. What do you say to that?
Silence the interloper! He dares contradict the Joya!
Buy my book or get out!
Why do you persist in laying out a pernicious argument for the abandonment of your people to the pleasures of the fanatics? Have you no soul, Malalai?
I would rather see my country dominated by pious bearded nihilists for 100 years than allow the World Despot Obama to send his vampire stormtroopers to rape our goats and salt our fields.
Death to the tyrant! Death to the goat rapists! Death to all those who ignore our sacred website!
Unhand me, cretins, lest your blood run to the sewers. I leave you now, but I shall return with true Canucks, pure of heart and with unwashed brains. Our war of words has just begun.
For the longer and straighter version of this fight, visit the Canada-Afghanistan Blog.
For the real progressive take, Terry Glavin tears Malalai and her friends to pieces.
Here’s an effective way to talk to the Taliban